Premier League weekend preview by Gerry McDonnell (Thursday, April 24, 2008)

I've just about had an oeuf At one time or another, we all make a mistake of gargantuan proportions. When the wife asked for a potential destination for a short trip, I foolishly answered 'France'. I completely forgot that the place was almost exclusively full of the French. As soon as we arrived I appreciated the gravity of my error, as the locals made absolutely no effort to speak any English. It appeared that they hadn't been informed of our arrival. The language barrier actually led me to be being deported. I popped into a café, but I didn't fancy eating any strange French food such as 'frites' or 'saucisses', so I helped myself to a biscuit from behind the counter. The owner went ballistic and called the police, and I was on the next plane back to England. I still feel embarrassed about being kicked out of Europe thanks to a simple ginger nut. Liverpool fans share my pain, they should console themselves with the 7/4 for a win over Birmingham. The police were on the ball over there though, unlike their English counterparts. When a French person is reported missing, their filth launch an immediate search; but the Manchester police haven't even begun their hunt to find poor Wayne. United are winless (and goalless) on their last six visits to Stamford Bridge, I'll struggle to find a better bet than Chelsea at 6/4. The North East of England is the one place on Earth that's actually worse than France. The locals are equally as undecipherable, and they take up twice the room. 15/8 is absolutely massive for a Newcastle win over West Ham. The North East does have its redeeming features; it remains a Redknapp-free area. Harry's decision to stay in Portsmouth was warmly received by the Geordie Nation, as it decreased the probability of them ever bumping into Jamie. I'm particularly thankful for the 23/10 for a draw between Portsmouth and Blackburn. Newcastle have taken a lead in the North East mini-league, which is a little bit like leading a race at the Special Olympics. Sunderland will beat Boro at 13/10 in the battle for the silver medal, but they're all winners really. There's a real scrap going on at the bottom of the table, and Fulham are almost certainly relegated. The chairman will most likely blame Prince Philip, MI5 and possibly MFI. I've put together 9/10 for a Manchester City win over the doomed Cottagers. Bolton have all the momentum in the relegation battle, but they won't receive any favours away at Tottenham. I expect the 10/11 for a Tottenham win to last about as long as a Geordie in a beauty contest. Graeme Murty should hang his head in shame after his dying swan act led to a three match ban for Alexander Hleb. Simulation is the unacceptable face of modern day football, alongside Steve Bruce. Wigan v Reading won't be pleasing to the eye, a draw looks the correct call at 12/5. If I was Robbie Savage, and I'm not (I'm quite good at football); I'd ask for Cesc Fabregas' shirt after Derby's 'match' against Arsenal. Such an item of memorabilia could potentially raise a tidy sum for when he upgrades his caravan. The 4/5 for Arsenal to beat Derby by two goals or more is remaining remarkably steady. I genuinely feel that Aston Villa will be right behind Arsenal at the top of the table next season - certainly in early August. The Villans are on fire in their quest to make it into Europe; they'll eat up and spit out the Toffeemen at 23/10. To say I was happy about last week's winning accer is an understatement; I felt like a Chelsea player after they practically booked their flight to Moscow. When Liverpool, Manchester City, Tottenham and Arsenal oblige for this week's 10/1 accer, I'll be happier than Ashley Cole after an invite into the cockpit. Weekend Betting: Chelsea v Man Utd Saturday 26th April 12:45 Live on Sky Chelsea 6/4 Draw 9/4 Man Utd 2/1 Get on: Chelsea Birmingham v Liverpool Saturday 26th April 15:00 Birmingham 15/8 Draw 9/4 Liverpool 7/4 Get on: Liverpool Man City v Fulham Saturday 26th April 15:00 Man City 9/10 Draw 5/2 Fulham 7/2 Get on: Man City Sunderland v Middlesbrough Saturday 26th April 15:00 Sunderland 13/10 Draw 9/4 Middlesbrough 12/5 Get on: Sunderland Tottenham v Bolton Saturday 26th April 15:00 Tottenham 10/11 Draw 5/2 Bolton 10/3 Get on: Tottenham West Ham v Newcastle Saturday 26th April 15:00 West Ham 6/4 Draw 23/10 Newcastle 15/8 Get on: Newcastle Wigan v Reading Saturday 26th April 15:00 Wigan 11/10 Draw 12/5 Reading 11/4 Get on: Draw Portsmouth v Blackburn Sunday 27th April 13:30 Live on Sky Portsmouth 5/4 Draw 23/10 Blackburn 13/5 Get on: Draw Everton v Aston Villa Sunday 27th April 16:00 Live on Sky Everton 13/10 Draw 23/10 Aston Villa 23/10 Get on: Aston Villa Derby v Arsenal Monday 28th April 20:00 Live on Setanta Derby 12/1 Draw 9/2 Arsenal 3/10 Get on: Arsenal Posted by soccerbetting.info @ 11:04 AM

Premier League weekend preview by Gerry McDonnell (Thursday, April 17, 2008)

There Ste Goes Again As a society, we're obsessed with appearance. I blame teen magazines for perpetuating the myth that skinniness equals beauty. If I had to choose between a thin girl and a lady with a fuller figure, I'd choose the one with the better personality. Obviously, if they're equally pleasant, then fatty's out of luck. Men are far less uptight about how they look. Petr Cech was happy to return to work when half of his face was hanging off; he wasn't concerned that he looked like Steve Bruce's better looking brother. Cech was back between the sticks within no time, as he managed to borrow the necessary protection from Ashley Cole. Not many people own chin guards, but Cashley is always wary of bouncing balls. I'll be jumping up and down when Everton beat Chelsea at 14/5. Juande Ramos believes that his players should take pride in their appearance, and has banned cakes and sweets from the canteen. I agree with Juande on this one; I'll only consider a muffin once a year. If Wigan get their head down against Tottenham, they can take a point at 5/2. Gareth Southgate is far more relaxed with his players' diet. In Mido and Alves, he has the fattest pair up front since a heavily pregnant Jordan. Bolton are about as pleasing to the eye as Peter Andre's often visited partner; a relatively attractive Boro will overpower them at 11/10. Thaksin Shinawatra is taking a real gamble in considering Phil Scolari as a future coach. Big Phil once punched an annoying player at the end of a match; there's a real chance that he might raise a fist to Ashley Cole. Pompey haven't won away at Manchester City since 1963, I'm going in deep on Sven's men at 11/8 to gain revenge for being tucked up on the Benjani deal. Steven Gerrard has suffered panic attacks ever since a gangster threatened to break his legs; he now collapses without warning roughly every 30 minutes. The precipitating midfielder and his pals have lost on their last two trips to the Cottage; current circumstances dictate that we back Fulham at 3/1. Arsenal's season can be compared to putting your hand up Lily Allen's blouse: it's been exciting, but the end result is a disappointment. It wouldn't surprise me if the Gunners laid a marker for next season by pounding Reading at 4/11. Paul Jewell's move to Derby is officially the greatest mistake since I fell for the 'I'm on the pill' line. After a six goal humiliation at home to Aston Villa, the Rams travel to West Ham to face a side who beat them 5-0 at 'Pride' Park. Derby have two hopes in this one, Bob Hope and no hope; and Bob Hope's dead. The Hammers are the weekend banker at 2/5. Many people believe that Mark Hughes will be the next manager of Manchester United. I'm not sure if Hughes is ready to succeed Sir Alex just yet, he needs to work on his referee-haranguing. I'd consider offering the position to Fergie's son; he would soon knock them into shape. United will pile in to Blackburn at 8/13. I was shocked to receive an email suggesting that I was out of line for calling Karen Brady unattractive. I guess the old adage is true: one man's meat is another man's poison, unless you're Ashley Cole. Aston Villa are one win away from their second straight double over the Brady bunch, and they're guaranteed a goal start if Ridgewell plays. I've seen worse bets than the 5/6 for a Villa win; I tipped them up last week. If Freddie Shepherd is to be believed, and why wouldn't he, the women of Newcastle are not the best looking breed. No wonder Jimmy Nail, Paul Gascoigne and Peter Beardsley left the area. It could get really ugly when the Toon Army host Sunderland; I'll side with Newcastle at 5/6. If, like me, your partner is less than pleasing aesthetically, feel free to use my adage to help them feel a little bit better about themselves. 'Beauty fades, but a solid ironing technique will last forever'. I'm not sure how long the 13/1 will last about this week's accer: Arsenal, West Ham, Aston Villa, Newcastle and Manchester City are the quite stunning selections. Weekend Betting: Everton v Chelsea Thursday 17th April 19:45 Live on Sky Everton 14/5 Draw 5/2 Chelsea 23/20 Get on: Everton Arsenal v Reading Saturday 19th April 12:45 Live on Sky Arsenal 4/11 Draw 4/1 Reading 11/1 Get on: Arsenal Fulham v Liverpool Saturday 19th April 15:00 Fulham 3/1 Draw 5/2 Liverpool Evs Get on: Fulham Middlesbrough v Bolton Saturday 19th April 15:00 Middlesbrough 11/10 Draw 23/10 Bolton 11/4 Get on: Middlesbrough West Ham v Derby Saturday 19th April 15:00 West Ham 2/5 Draw 4/1 Derby 9/1 Get on: West Ham Wigan v Tottenham Saturday 19th April 15:00 Wigan 7/4 Draw 5/2 Tottenham 7/4 Get on: Draw Blackburn v Man Utd Saturday 19th April 17:15 Live on Setanta Blackburn 11/2 Draw 3/1 Man Utd 8/13 Get on: Man Utd Aston Villa v Birmingham Sunday 20th April 12:00 Aston Villa 5/6 Draw 13/5 Birmingham 4/1 Get on: Aston Villa Newcastle v Sunderland Sunday 20th April 13:30 Live on Sky Newcastle 5/6 Draw 5/2 Sunderland 7/2 Get on: Newcastle Man City v Portsmouth Sunday 20th April 16:00 Live on Sky Man City 11/8 Draw 23/10 Portsmouth 11/5 Get on: Man City Labels: premier-league-betting Posted by soccerbetting.info @ 1:39 PM

Premier League weekend preview by Gerry McDonnell (Thursday, April 10, 2008)

Red Bull - It Gives You Wins I do enjoy a moral dilemma. An intellectual friend asked if I would kill a chicken to save a chicken's life. I honestly replied that I'd happily slaughter a chicken if I missed breakfast. He went on to ask if I would ever use inside information to profit from gambling. I once again answered in all honesty that I have never been involved in such a practice; but then again, I don't know Harry Redknapp. There is still uproar amongst the betting community whenever the controversial 'next Portsmouth manager' market is discussed. I must point out that there is no evidence to suggest that Harry Redknapp was involved in a scam, or in fact that a scam actually took place. I will just say that the 11/4 for a Newcastle win over Portsmouth should be investigated further. David Bentley has admitted to being a former gambling addict. 'Bents', or to use his more familiar nickname, 'the vastly overrated David Bentley' has an addictive personality, and is currently obsessed with DIY. This did not come as a shock. Liverpool will pull off a win over Blackburn at 8/15. My wife is a stereotypical female; she doesn't understand the offside rule. She thinks that a player should be penalised if he receives the ball in an offside position, even if the last touch comes off a defender - as long as the attacking side intended to play the ball forward to the player in the advanced position in the first phase of play. What a doughnut. The betting proposition between Derby and Aston Villa is also perfectly clear: the Villa win at 8/13. I was quite shocked to read that a male is due to give birth. I just hope that Frank drops it in time for Chelsea's game against Wigan. Bookmakers have delivered 1/4 for a Chelsea win - I shall be babysitting. West Ham were once embroiled in a betting furore when Paul Kitson kicked the ball straight into touch from the kick-off. Harry Redknapp was the manager of West Ham at the time, but there is no evidence to suggest that he was involved in a spread betting scam, or in fact that a scam actually took place. I prefer to believe that Paul Kitson is just not a good passer of a ball, like the Bolton players. The Hammers will add a final nail to Bolton's Premier League coffin at 13/5. When injury-prone C-list-celebrity romancer Jonathan Woodgate labelled Juande Ramos a 'proper manager', it would be safe to assume that he was having a sly dig at Gareth Southgate. Ramos may edge Southgate in experience, but how many pizza adverts has he starred in? I shall be topping up on the 9/2 for a Middlesbrough win over Tottenham. Alex McLeish is a frustrated thespian; he wishes his players luck before each match by saying "Break a leg". Damien Johnson is the latest player to see red for a career-threatener; Everton will punish the weakened Brummies at 6/4. Emotions always run high when Arsenal meet Manchester United, but that does not excuse the food-fight that broke out after a particularly fiery encounter. Such actions are morally reprehensible when there are starving children in this world; I can't even begin to imagine what Dawn French's kids were thinking. I'll make a small donation to the needy when Arsenal beat Manchester United at 4/1. Manchester City have been heavily linked with Ronaldinho, but I remain sceptical. It reminds me of the time when Birmingham City were linked with Maradona, but he turned the move down as his two-footed over-the-top tackle was lightweight at best. We should all get stuck in to the 6/5 for a Sunderland win over Manchester City. People have been emailing me to ask if I know the identity of the player who allegedly had a £50,000 gambling debt written off in exchange for getting himself sent off. I honestly have no idea who this player is, I just know that there is no evidence to suggest that Harry Redknapp was involved in a scam, or in fact that a scam actually took place. I am reasonably sure about the value in taking even money for a Reading win over Fulham. In a week where the morality of football has been questioned, the filth have now arrested senior figures at Birmingham City. At the time of writing, no charges have been filed, but it's expected that David Sullivan will be charged with 'outraging public decency', presumably for allowing Karen Brady to enter the public arena. I'll be outraged if Aston Villa, Sunderland, Newcastle and Chelsea fail to land an incorruptible 15/1 accer. Weekend Betting: Birmingham v Everton Saturday 12th April 15:00 Birmingham 2/1 Draw 23/10 Everton 6/4 Get on: Everton Bolton v West Ham Saturday 12th April 15:00 Bolton 5/4 Draw 12/5 West Ham 13/5 Get on: West Ham Derby v Aston Villa Saturday 12th April 15:00 Derby 11/2 Draw 3/1 Aston Villa 8/13 Get on: Aston Villa Reading v Fulham Saturday 12th April 15:00 Reading Evs Draw 12/5 Fulham 10/3 Get on: Reading Sunderland v Man City Saturday 12th April 15:00 Sunderland 6/5 Draw 23/10 Man City 12/5 Get on: Sunderland Tottenham v Middlesbrough Saturday 12th April 15:00 Tottenham 4/5 Draw 11/4 Middlesbrough 9/2 Get on: Middlesbrough Portsmouth v Newcastle Saturday 12th April 17:15 Live on Setanta Portsmouth 6/5 Draw 12/5 Newcastle 11/4 Get on: Newcastle Liverpool v Blackburn Sunday 13th April 13:30 Live on Sky Liverpool 8/15 Draw 3/1 Blackburn 13/2 Get on: Liverpool Man Utd v Arsenal Sunday 13th April 16:00 Live on Sky Man Utd Evs Draw 12/5 Arsenal 4/1 Get on: Arsenal Chelsea v Wigan Monday 14th April 20:00 Live on Setanta Chelsea 1/4 Draw 5/1 Wigan 14/1 Get on: Chelsea Posted by soccerbetting.info @ 2:50 PM